Abortion...

Bonjour my peeps; I know I may sound silly but you know you like it!

We are going to dedicate today's entire blog to abortion. The reason for this is that, today I over heard a young couple, who is going to be blessed with a child, have a conversation about getting rid of all their "problems" by going to the abortion clinic. I am definitely not one to judge, but when it comes to killing another human being (which in fact, you are!), you better believe I'm gonna open my big mouth!

When you are lucky enough to bring up the topic of abortion, the first thing that is going to exit my esophagus is: murder. I try to understand that a baby is an extremely hard task for young mothers or parents, but all you had to do was keep your junk packed (and locked) in your trunk honey! By unlocking that trunk, you just gifted yourself with a baby! If I were ever in that situation, I would suck it up and give birth, but adoption would enter the picture during those nine months. And I say, "if" because before becoming impregnated, you must attract the opposite sex. Once you do attract one hunk of a guy, they have to show that they like you by making a "move," and how awesome for me that no guy has ever made that move. So I just nod, smile, and act like I know what I am talking about when conversations arise on the topic of physicality with men. But in reality, what's most likely "happening" with me and guys, is me checking their fine a** out! I have plenty more opinions, so if you are enjoying yourself or agreeing with me, please keep listening!

After murder comes the fact that this child was given to you so that you could nurture and protect him/her before he/she enters this cruel world. Luckily I was sent to my amazing mother, because without her guidance I wouldn't know who I would be today. By aborting a child, you take away his/her right to live and you prove how heartless we humans can be. All I can focus on is how these murdered children will not be able to experience a sunset, feel the touch of an Autumn breeze, listen to beautiful lyrics, or witness a newly formed rainbow with the sweet scent of rain accompanying it. Granted, I am quite positive that heaven is wonderful and amazing, but life is something everyone should live and learn and come to love. That is why God created us, right? To live and to learn! When you abort a child, you not only take away the right to breathe, but you take away their right to love other people more than they love themselves. And that, to me, is the darkest side of humanity.

Please before you go to bed tonight, if anyone reading this is contemplating abortion or knows someone who is second guessing their child's life, assure them what the right decision is. No child deserves to die before they have lived, fight to keep that truth alive. Thank you for listening! Until nextime!:)

Equal Rights

What is up!?

I may seem enthusiastic, but actually I am on the verge of breaking something. I flipping forgot to be smart for a milli-second and locked my keys in my car. Now, I am sure most of you have done this before, but this is my fourth time forgetting my keys! I can understand once or twice, but whatever. And after doing that, I came home and found out that I cannot use PowerPoint for my senior project... It has just been such a great day. Which in fact, when I think about days, all you can really think about is how crazy the next ten are going to be.

The next ten weeks translates into one word: graduation. That can be a good or bad word, so I tend to not think of it very often. To graduate, there are certain requirements such as the Senior Project. I am now in a position where I have to make multiple posters and roll with that idea, instead of making a fun and easy PowerPoint. Just barely yesterday I started working on my portfolio, which was easy, but the actual project might be a little tricky. However, I love creativity and originality so I will try and have fun with it. But mostly what is occupying my mind is my Gay Rights speech tomorrow.

Gay Rights is a very important but touchy subject to me. Though I do not have many friends and family that are homosexual, I still support the cause very strongly! Homosexuals are constantly being judged and discriminated against by people who either believe in a book written five hundred years ago or who just enjoy being a jerk. Morgan Freeman is one of my all time favorite celebrities and he says, " I hate the word homophobia. It's not a phobia. You're not scared. You're an asshole." Now that might be a bit too blunt for some of you, but blunt is my middle name, so get over it. can't stand people who bring up reasons that they cannot even explain. Some people say that God does now "allow" homosexuality. I always reply with a simple answer such as, " doesn't God love everyone?" Please try and explain to me how God loves everyone except homosexuals? It does not make sense and so obviously some of you are incorrect. Other people say that homosexuals cannot reproduce. Well there is such a thing called adoption, which I am highly recommending even for myself because there are already to many homeless, starving, parent less children in our world. Most strangers, after hearing my above comments, say how controlling and disagreeable I must be. But, I assure you, I am just sharing my opinion, and you have the right not to listen, so don't complain. Though I will say, I am open to listening to others opinions, but if I know I will most likely never agree, then I usually move on to the next conflict. Which reminds me...

Conflicts. On Saturday, March 9th, my mother decided she was having an awful day for no reason, so she turned into Godzilla and fought with me all day. One of our fights surrounded the topic that I still have not found a job. I listened to the same old complaints she has for about ten minutes. During that excruciatingly long time, all I could really think about was how, though I feel very bad, I do not feel bad about staying home rather than having multiple doors slammed in my face. I believe the only reason I do not currently have a job, is because people seem to not want to give me a chance. I was given a chance once, back in February of 2012, and that chance got me four hours a week for six month's until I finally quit. I can't deny that I was sick of receiving twenty dollar pay checks every two weeks and a lovely disrespectful employer every time I showed up for work. But, it is how it is and now instead of silently fighting with my boss, I actually fight with my mother. By fight, I mean mostly listen because usually I am to lazy to actually state my case when I know my mother won't listen. Listening is key in a conversation and I bet most would agree that talking to a wall is not the greatest experience one can have.

That is all I would like to share with you guys today, so thanks for listening! Until nextime.
                                                                                                                                            Arianna Rapp

P.s. if anyone wants to leave any fun little tips to aid me in finding a decent job, I would be quite happy! Adios!

Bullies

As I sit here in the office as an office aid, all I can think about are bullies. Recently, my younger brother Jordan was involved in a scandal that involved a bully, but none of the situation was Jordan's fault. The bully is facing some major charges, which soothes my mind, but that does not mean I am 100% OK with everything that went on. This bully is obviously the kind of person who gets satisfaction out of bringing others pain.
Pain is not something that one person should wish onto another. I cannot say I am the best with dealing with pain, but I know that it only brings harm and regret. My brother did not deserve the pain that this kid caused him, and personally, I regret not verbally shaming the young man. Obviously, pain and regret are not the best topics to discuss, so don't mind me if I continue to other matters.

The other matters I do not really care to discuss, (but I am going to because I am bored here in school) is my upcoming weekend. These next three days will be spent spending time on homework, my senior project, my little brother Braxton's cheer competition, and hopefully, some type of interaction with friends. My weekend sounds fantastic, I know. But honestly, none of my loner-ness is my fault. Ever since last year, everyone has changed in ways that I cannot bare to be around and apart of. Hence why my mother is my bff. Best. Friends. Forever. Forever is quite the long word, and I can truly say that I only have three friends that I could live with forever... Other than my mom. Those three friends are Maycin, Alma, and Zoe; the only friends that I just "click" with. I can't really explain it any other way, they are my sisters. That word sisters means a lot to be because I do not have any blood related sisters; I have had step-sisters, but honestly, I disliked them. Sometimes I wonder how my life would have gone if I hadn't have moved here to Idaho and if I could have stayed with all of my girls. Funny thing is, the only reason we moved here was because of my mom's old lover, ex-husband (twice removed), whatever. He visited UT, spent some time with my mother and proposed. Again. Two days later, me and my mom were in the Hollywood Video parking lot and she asked me if I cared to move. I should have said no, but I didn't, so I am over it. Though I always remember that I moved here for my mother and her twice removed jack ass of an (ex) husband. They freaking re-divorced after only three years! I should have gotten a sign that day in the car to not move, but then she would have blamed me for the rest of my life.

This is way off topic of my previous ramblings, but I am very happy that I can upload my thoughts to you random readers. I have two gnarly friends named Brittany and Skyler that read my blog (shout out to them) and even if they are the only ones, they are enough. Blogging is so much different than talking. On my blog I can just share my thoughts without having to think about it first. I am usually a very blunt person anyways, but being able to just write down how I feel with no interruption is pretty cool and sometimes calming. I am thinking right now how next time I write I am going to write more about worldly problems and my opinion of those problems. I want whoever is reading to know that I am an extremely opinionated person, but I do not express my opinion so that I can shove it down my readers throats, I express my opinion so others have my side to think about. I am not always right, but neither is everyone else.

Thank you for listening/reading. Until nextime! :)

Confusing Emotions

Hello, again.

I understand that I haven't blogged in quite a long time. I feel as if I have been at the bottom of the ocean these past couple of weeks. Procrastination and sleep have been my two best friends recently.

My mother and I had a nice long talk last night about letting go. It's funny how we do the things we do, and we don't notice what we truly have done until it's almost over. My first realization that I encountered last night was that, to truly let go of someone or something, you must accept the part of yourself of which you are letting go. I understand that that must make no sense to some, but as my mother puts it, "when we let go of someone or something, we're not really letting go of that in particular. We are letting go of that reflection of ourselves." My mom is a very wise woman. So talking with her sometimes feels as if you are talking with Gandhi or even Buddha. My mother sees and understands what most people do not. Honestly, sometimes I love her active mind, and sometimes I despise it. She makes you see the parts of yourself that you hope to keep hidden.

Going along with that, a couple of month's ago I let go of someone who I have struggled to love my whole life: my father. When I say let go, I do not mean he died, I mean I let him exit my life for good. He never really loved or accepted me the way I hoped he would. I finally understood that in order to move on with my life, I needed to take him out of it. Since that time, I can honestly say I am happy! My mother fills every need that I may have, including a fatherly guidance. I don't know why I am just now expressing these thoughts because I wrote them down long ago and then burned them. If you ever need personal release, I highly recommend papers, pens, and a lighter. Anyhow, probably the reason my dad has come up, is because yesterday I let go of another harmful piece of myself. That piece can be described as pain, confusion, sadness, longing, and waiting. What I physically let go of was an ex-best friend. It may seem silly, but she was the only one I had for so long. She knew I had no one else, and so subconsciously she started to control me in ways neither of us realized. It all started with another girl (who's name I will not mention); she got closer and closer to my best friend, in physical ways as well as mental ways. I felt uncomfortable, so I backed away. Ever since then, situations keep happening that pull us farther apart. I used to keep fighting for our dwindling friendship, but now I see that it is time to let it all go and move on. You need to let go of the old to bring in the new, and that is just what I plan to do.

My next, and current struggle is my baby cousin Jaxon. He was born to parents that love him but that cannot take good care of him. His father is a bipolar-schizophrenic and his mother carries both those traits as well. We all (my family, his family) have taken him under our wing and stayed by his side through all of his troubles. I do not want to go on any further because it is not my story to tell. I am just grateful to be apart of helping my beautiful baby cousin gain the life he so rightly deserves! Even though all of the drama with my cousin Jaxon is going on, I still have to attend many more days of drama filled high school.

About high school, nothing exciting is happening. Last weekend my team and I attended districts and won two first place trophies and one second place trophy! Other than that, I have homework to finish and a Senior Project to construct. I swear, I want to graduate and grow up (some what), but I do not want to take the steps to do it. I still have no idea what college I am going to attend. Utah Valley University, college in Colorado, and college in Oregon are the choices I still have on my mind. Most likely, I will attend UVU because my two best friends Maycin and Alma will be there, and it is in the state that I have always loved and called home. And even though I am expected to go to any college of my choice, I still wonder what my future path will be, and if college will answer some of my questions.

Sometimes I wonder what my purpose here on earth is. Why did God send me here? What special duties am I supposed to uphold? I feel as if I am wandering through these days and not truly living them. I am blessed with things that most do not get to experience in their lifetime. So why do I feel so helpless and small? I plan to figure all of those questions out, but for now I am just going to try and relax and ignore my personal thoughts! I am sorry this post was not as pleasant, but thank you for listening again.

Until nextime, your friend
                                         Arianna Rapp